THE BIBLE IS BULLSHIT

(4:9) “Am I my brother’s keeper?”

Quoted by President Obama at the 2012 National Prayer Breakfast, implying that the answer is, “Yes, we are our brother’s keeper,” although Cain probably meant something more like, “I don’t know, it’s not my day to watch him.”

(4:11-12, 16-17) “A fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.”

As a punishment for killing Abel, God says Cain will be “a fugitive and a vagabond.” Yet in just a few verses (4:16-17) Cain will settle down, marry, have a son, and build a city. This is not the activity one would expect from a fugitive and a vagabond.

BIBLICAL PROPHECY SCOREBOARD

FAIL - 2

SUCCESS - 0

(4:8) “Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.” 

Because God liked Abel’s animal sacrifice more than Cain’s vegetables, Cain killed his brother Abel in a fit of religious jealousy.

(4:1) “And Adam knew his wife; and she conceived.”

This is the first sexual intercourse mentioned in the Bible.

(4:17) “And Cain knew his wife.”

That’s nice, but where the hell did she come from? “The Bible doesn’t mention any of Cain’s sisters. Well, maybe he married his mom, or maybe God pulled another creation over in the next county. In any case, Cain and the mysterious Mrs. Cain have a son (another blue cigar!). His name is Enoch and he builds a city (population 3).

Although the Bible doesn’t say where Mrs. Cain came from, Joseph Smith provided the answer in “The Inspired Version” of the Bible, which was his very own “translation”. Here’s what it says: “And it came to pass, that Cain took one of his brother’s daughters to wife, and they loved Satan more than God.” – Gen.5:13

So according to Joseph Smith (and he ought to know!) Cain married one of his nieces. He doesn’t say, though, which of Cain’s brothers was Mrs. Cain’s father.

(4:15) “The LORD set a mark on Cain, lest any finding him should kill him.”

But God is worried, too. He says whoever kills Cain will be punished sevenfold (whatever that means). Just to make sure, though, God puts a mark on Cain so no one will kill him. Good idea. But it contradicts the law given in Gen.9:6 that says whoever kills shall be killed.

Until the 1978 revelation to Mormon President, Spencer W. Kimball, black men were not allowed to hold the priesthood. This was based, in part, on Genesis 4:15, where God placed a mark on Cain after he had killed his brother Abel. Joseph Smith and later LDS leaders interpreted the “mark upon Cain” to be turning of Cain’s skin (and that of all his descendents) black.

It should be noted, however, that Mormons were not alone in this interpretation of Gen.4:15. Many Protestant denominations at the time Joseph Smith founded the LDS Church (1830) had the same racist understanding of the “mark of Cain.”

God likes Abel’s dead animals better than Cain’s fruits and vegetables. Why? Well, no reason is given, but it probably has something to do with the amount of pain, blood, and gore involved. 4:3-5

Lamech kills a man and claims that since Cain’s murderer would be punished sevenfold, whoever murders him will be punished seventy-seven fold. That sounds fair. 4:23-24

(4:8) “Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.” 

Because God liked Abel’s animal sacrifice more than Cain’s vegetables, Cain killed his brother Abel in a fit of religious jealousy.

(4:19) “And Lamech took him two wives.”

Lamech is the first of a long line of biblical men with more than one wife. 

He was a fugitive and a vagabond.

Genesis 4:11-12

And now art thou cursed from the earth, which hath opened her mouth to receive thy brother’s blood from thy hand; When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.

He settled down, married, had a son, and built a city.

Genesis 4:16-17

And Cain went out from the presence of the LORD, and dwelt in the land of Nod, on the east of Eden. And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch.

YES

Genesis 4:4

And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering.

Genesis 8:20-21

And Noah builded an altar unto the LORD; and took of every clean beast, and of every clean fowl, and offered burnt offerings on the altar. And the Lord smelled a sweet savour.

Genesis 15:9-10

And he [God] said unto him [Abraham], Take me an heifer of three years old, and a she goat of three years old, and a ram of three years old, and a turtledove, and a young pigeon. And he took unto him all these, and divided them in the midst, and laid each piece one against another.

Exodus 20:24

An altar of earth thou shalt make unto me, and shalt sacrifice thereon thy burnt offerings, and thy peace offerings, thy sheep, and thine oxen: in all places where I record my name I will come unto thee, and I will bless thee.

Exodus 29:11-37

And thou shalt kill the bullock before the LORD….

Leviticus 1:5

And he shall kill the bullock before the LORD…. 

Leviticus 23:12-18

And ye shall offer … an he lamb without blemish of the first year for a burnt offering unto the LORD….

Numbers 18:17-19

Thou shalt sprinkle their blood upon the altar, and shalt burn their fat for an offering made by fire, for a sweet savour unto the LORD.

Deuteronomy 12:27

And thou shalt offer thy burnt offerings, the flesh and the blood, upon the altar of the LORD thy God: and the blood of thy sacrifices shall be poured out upon the altar of the LORD thy God, and thou shalt eat the flesh.

NO

Ps.40:6

Sacrifice and offering thou didst not desire.

Psalm 50:13

Will I eat of the flesh of bulls, or drink the blood of goats?

Psalm 51:16

For thou desirest not sacrifice … thou delightest not in burnt offerings.

Isaiah 1:11

I delight not in the blood of bullocks, or of lambs, or of he goats.

Isaiah 66:3

He that killeth an ox is as if he slew a man.

Jeremiah 6:20

Your burnt offerings are not acceptable, nor your sacrifices sweet unto me.

Micah 6:6-7

Shall I come before him with burnt offerings, with calves of a year old? Will the LORD be pleased with thousands oframs?

Matthew 9:13, 12:7

I will have mercy, and not sacrifice.

God has respect for some people.

Genesis 4:4

And the Lord had respect unto Abel.

Exodus 2:25

And God looked upon the children of Israel, and God had respect unto them.

Leviticus 26:9

For I will have respect unto you, and make your fruitful, and multiply you, and establish my covenant with you.

2 Kings 13:23

And the Lord was gracious unto them … and had respect unto them, because of his covenant with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob…

Psalm 138:6

Though the Lord be high, yet hath he respect for the lowly.

God respects no one.

Deuteronomy 10:17

For the Lord your God … regardeth not persons.

2 Chronicles 19:7

For there is no iniquity with the Lord our God, nor respect of persons.

Acts 10:34

God is no respecter of persons.

Romans 2:11

For there is no respect of persons with God.

Galatians 2:6

God accepteth no man’s person.

Ephesians 6:9

Neither is there respect of persons with him.

Colossians 3:25

There is no respect of persons.

1 Peter 1:17

And if ye call upon the Father, who without respect of persons, jugeth according to every man’s work.

THE BIBLE

4:1 And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD.

4:2 And she again bare his brother Abel. And Abel was a keeper of sheep, but Cain was a tiller of the ground.

4:3 And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD.

4:4 And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering:

4:5 But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.

4:6 And the LORD said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen?

4:7 If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou shalt rule over him.

4:8 And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.

4:9 And the LORD said unto Cain, Where is Abel thy brother? And he said, I know not: Am I my brother’s keeper?

4:10 And he said, What hast thou done? the voice of thy brother’s blood crieth unto me from the ground.

4:11 And now art thou cursed from the earth, which hath opened her mouth to receive thy brother’s blood from thy hand;

4:12 When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.

4:13 And Cain said unto the LORD, My punishment is greater than I can bear.

4:14 Behold, thou hast driven me out this day from the face of the earth; and from thy face shall I be hid; and I shall be a fugitive and a vagabond in the earth; and it shall come to pass, that every one that findeth me shall slay me.

4:15 And the LORD said unto him, Thereforewhosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold. And the LORD set a mark upon Cain, lest any finding him should kill him.

4:16 And Cain went out from the presence of the LORD, and dwelt in the land of Nod, on the east of Eden.

4:17 And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch.

4:18 And unto Enoch was born Irad: and Irad begat Mehujael: and Mehujael begat Methusael: and Methusael begat Lamech.

4:19 And Lamech took unto him two wives: the name of the one was Adah, and the name of the other Zillah.

4:20 And Adah bare Jabal: he was the father of such as dwell in tents, and of such as have cattle.

4:21 And his brother’s name was Jubal: he was the father of all such as handle the harp and organ.

4:22 And Zillah, she also bare Tubalcain, an instructer of every artificer in brass and iron: and the sister of Tubalcain was Naamah.

4:23 And Lamech said unto his wives, Adah and Zillah, Hear my voice; ye wives of Lamech, hearken unto my speech: for I have slain a man to my wounding, and a young man to my hurt.

4:24 If Cain shall be avenged sevenfold, truly Lamech seventy and sevenfold.

4:25 And Adam knew his wife again; and she bare a son, and called his name Seth: For God, said she, hath appointed me another seed instead of Abel, whom Cain slew.

4:26 And to Seth, to him also there was born a son; and he called his name Enos: then began men to call upon the name of the LORD.

ABSURDITY

 (4:14) ”Every one that findeth me shall slay me.”

Cain is worried after killing Abel and says, “Every one who finds me shall slay me.” This is a strange concern since there were only two other humans alive at the time — his parents!

(4:15) “The LORD set a mark on Cain, lest any finding him should kill him.”

But God is worried, too. He says whoever kills Cain will be punished sevenfold (whatever that means). Just to make sure, though, God puts a mark on Cain so no one will kill him. Good idea. But it contradicts the law given in Gen.9:6 that says whoever kills shall be killed.

Until the 1978 revelation to Mormon President, Spencer W. Kimball, black men were not allowed to hold the priesthood. This was based, in part, on Genesis 4:15, where God placed a mark on Cain after he had killed his brother Abel. Joseph Smith and later LDS leaders interpreted the “mark upon Cain” to be turning of Cain’s skin (and that of all his descendents) black.

It should be noted, however, that Mormons were not alone in this interpretation of Gen.4:15. Many Protestant denominations at the time Joseph Smith founded the LDS Church (1830) had the same racist understanding of the “mark of Cain.”

(4:17) “And Cain knew his wife.”

That’s nice, but where the hell did she come from? “The Bible doesn’t mention any of Cain’s sisters. Well, maybe he married his mom, or maybe God pulled another creation over in the next county. In any case, Cain and the mysterious Mrs. Cain have a son (another blue cigar!). His name is Enoch and he builds a city (population 3).

Although the Bible doesn’t say where Mrs. Cain came from, Joseph Smith provided the answer in “The Inspired Version” of the Bible, which was his very own “translation”. Here’s what it says: “And it came to pass, that Cain took one of his brother’s daughters to wife, and they loved Satan more than God.” – Gen.5:13

So according to Joseph Smith (and he ought to know!) Cain married one of his nieces. He doesn’t say, though, which of Cain’s brothers was Mrs. Cain’s father.

Another answer is provided by the Pre-Adamite theory.

(4:23-24) “If Cain shall be avenged sevenfold, truly Lamech seventy and sevenfold.”

Lamech kills a man and claims that since Cain’s murderer would be punished sevenfold, whoever murders him will be punished seventy-seven fold. That sounds fair.

 (4:26) “And to Seth … was born a son.”

Where’d he find his wife?

The Serpent

The serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field — Genesis 3:1

In Christian Identity theology, the serpent is a black male (“beast of the field”), possessed by the devil, who seduced Eve. Cain is the child that is born from this union, the evil son of the devil and the first Jew. All Jews are descended from Cain.

The Two Seed Theory

I will put enmity … between thy seed and her seed. — Genesis 3:15

In Christian Identity theology, Genesis 3:15 is considered to be the most important verse in the Bible.

The serpent’s seed includes the Jews and all non-white people; Adam’s seed refers to white people only.

Cain was the son of the serpent and Eve, and, after he murdered his half-brother Abel, intermarried with the Pre-Adamic people of color in the land of Nod. All non-white humans are descended from Cain.

After Abel died, Seth was born to Adam and Eve and became the ancestor of all white people.

The serpent’s seed (Jews and non-white people) are evil; Adam’s seed (white folks) are good. And God forever “put enmity” between them in Genesis 3:15.

“In sorrow thou shalt bring forth children. … Thy husband … shall rule over thee.”

God punishes Eve, and all women after her, with the pains of childbirth and subjection to men. 3:16

God curses the serpent. From now on the serpent will crawl on his belly and eat dust. One wonders how he got around before — by hopping on his tail, perhaps? But snakes don’t eat dust, do they? 3:14

Because Adam listened to Eve, God cursed the ground and causes thorns and thistles to grow. Before this, according to the (false) Genesis story, plants had no natural defenses. The rose had no thorn, cacti were spineless, holly leaves were smooth, and the nettle had no sting. Foxgloves, oleander, and milkweeds were all perfectly safe to eat. 3:17-18

Yes, everyone is descended from Adam and Eve.

Genesis 3:20

And Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.

Some are not.

Hebrews 7:3

Melchisedec, king of Salem, priest of the most high God,” was Without father, without mother, without descent, having neither beginning of days, nor end of life; but made like unto the Son of God; abideth a priest continually.